My Teddy

by R. B. Chandler
(Arcosanti, AZ)

What can I say about Teddy? Where do I begin? Teddy and I go way back, roughly 61 years to be more exact. He was a child's first bear, my bear, and as my mother tells it, it was love at first sight. For the first few years of my life Teddy was just a stuffed animal I played with as all small young children do, I suppose. It is hard to say when our relationship changed.
Life wasn't always easy for me going up. I was far too young to understand what a divorce was, or what it meant. In any case, I acquired the stepfather and really wonderful grandfather to go with him. Then came the move to Idaho where I lived life as a normal six-year-old child in a small town. Made a fort and the neighbor’s garage ceiling, tried to build a go cart with my grandfathers self-propelled lawnmower, played flashlight tag at night (the antique version of laser tag), and all the while Teddy was just there on the bed. Then came the move to Florida, and along with it a change that no child should have to go through.
At first, the abuse was subtle and undefined. Slavery comes in all forms and my life as a child slowly ceased to exist. Looking back it is hard to pinpoint exactly when the abuse became physical, but by then Teddy had become something more than just a stuffed animal. He was my best friend and confidant; he was the one I poured my heart and soul out to late at night. Teddy was the

one who the dried my tears and held me tight through the storm that was my life growing up. Teddy was filled with love to overflowing. Even today, as ragged and threadbare as he has become, the love is still there; deep inside him and deep within me.
Years of past and I never really gave any thought to who Teddy was until now. So I would like some help finding out what kind of teddy bear Teddy is and then find someone who can do a certain amount of repair work on his plastic nose, with new eyes, and some other minor repairs. I want Teddy to stay just the way he is with all his scars from past repairs. I just want to fix his face so he can look out at the world again with me.
Teddy is 2 feet tall and 9 inches wide. His arms are 6 inches and his legs are 8 inches. His snout is 3 inches wide, 4 inches long and 2 1/2 inches deep. He is pretty much all brown except for his paw pads. His eyes are 1 inch in diameter and had black dots that wiggle around inside once upon a time. Teddy plastic snout is slightly unusual because it also comes with a throat extension.
Teddy and I both come with scars, some you can see, and some you can't. We like our scars; they have made us into who we are today. I just need a little help finding out just what kind of bear Teddy is and to find someone who can do a few minor repairs to my friend.

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